Rurouni Kenshin goes Random!
by Sajianprincess
Summary: Ok this one is even more random then the other's (if that's possible). This one has a lot of different animes in it as well as Final Fantasy 6 (3 in the US). So R&R and enjoy.
1. What if She Knew?

Disclaimer: I like so many others do not own Rurouni Kenshin. Even if I wanted too. Or any other random shows, books, movies, etc. I might mention. Maybe... ok I don't or ever will unless I want to pay lots and lots of fines... I'm done now. I think... Yes I am.  
  
Chapter one: What if she knew?  
  
Kenshin: Uh who knew what?  
  
Me: Umm, uh I don't know.  
  
Kenshin: How can you not know?  
  
Me: I'm a girl and the title is what if she knew.  
  
Kenshin: Then how are you going to tell the story?  
  
Me: IT'S A SPECIAL STORY! Where I know everything even though I don't know everything!  
  
Kenshin: Oro?  
  
Me: I'm magical; I can make stuff up as I go, because I'M SPECIAL! That I am.  
  
Kenshin: Ok special in your own little world that you are.  
  
Me: Uh hello the word special used in the context must be capitalized, italicized, and bold!  
  
Kenshin: Fine then! Let's just get on with the story now.  
  
Me: Uh I need a narrator some who won't contradict me.  
  
Yahiko: I will!  
  
Miss Kaoru: Little boys shouldn't narrate!  
  
Yahiko: I'M NOT A LITTLE BOY!  
  
Me: Uh hello you two are part of the story you can't narrate.  
  
Kaoru/Yahiko: Oh...  
  
Me: I know I'll pick a character randomly from another anime! (Pondering)  
  
(Someone random shorty from the audience raises their hand)  
  
Person: I will.  
  
Kenshin: Oro?  
  
Me: Ok but just because you talk in italics ok.  
  
Person: Ok!  
  
Me: So what's your name and what anime are you from.  
  
Person: Lauren and I'm you friend not from an anime.  
  
Me: Oh yeh (really quietly so no one can here) I forgot. (Back in normal voice) Any way since your short and I don't want to offend anyone by calling you what I normally do; I dub you Shorty for the rest of the never ending story!  
  
Right now no one: Uh wrong story you were going to do it about Kenshin remember?  
  
Me: Oh yeh oops heh eh. I knew that, or did I? Never mind any who, as I was going to originally say, I now dub you Shorty the Master of Italics until the end of the Kenshin story! Oh and by the way you have no say in what you say.  
  
Shorty: Huh?  
  
Me: No more of this, on with the story!  
  
Now the real chapter: What if she knew?  
  
Shorty: Our story begins in the city of Tokyo more then a century ago.  
  
Kenshin: Miss Kaoru!  
  
Kaoru: Yes Kenshin?  
  
Kenshin: I'm going in to town for a bit is there anything that you would like me to get?  
  
Kaoru: Uh... (Pondering for a bit) yes could you get some more tofu?  
  
Kenshin: Fondue?  
  
Kaoru: No, Tofu! Tofu!  
  
Kenshin: Oh ok, I was gona say I think your getting ahead of your self fondue won't be around for another century or so. But ok I'll pick some up on my way back.  
  
Kaoru: Thank you.  
  
Shorty: Kenshin then wondered to down town Tokyo were he bumped in to Miss Megumi literally.  
  
Kenshin: Oh I'm sorry Miss Megumi that I am.  
  
Megumi: That's alright Sir Ken, I wasn't watching were I was going.  
  
Kenshin: I'm afraid I must be on my way or else I'll end up running late. It was nice to see you Miss Megumi that it was.  
  
Megumi: Good bye Sir Ken. (To herself) Now were could he be off to in such a hurry? (A little light bulb went on over her head) What if he's seeing some one! I should go tell Miss Kaoru! How fun it would be to see her face when I tell her! Then Kenshin will leave her and be all mine! Muahahahaha!  
  
(People passing by look at her as if she's nuts.)  
  
Megumi: (glaring at the people) well what you are looking at!  
  
Shorty: Now back with Kenshin as he strolls down the street.  
  
Kenshin: Now where was that place again?  
  
Shorty: Just as Kenshin round the corner a yellow rat ran by him.  
  
Kenshin: Oro?  
  
Rat: Pika?  
  
Shorty: Yes that's right it was a Pikachu not just any Pikachu ether.  
  
Ash: Pikachu! Where are you?  
  
Pikachu: (looks back to see Ash coming closer) Pika! Pi, Ka...  
  
Kenshin: What a funny looking creature?  
  
Pikachu: (looking up at Kenshin) Uh can you hide me that kid is scary. Then I'll go back to my own anime. Ok.  
  
Shorty: Just to point out Kenshin does NOT speak pokemon for some bizarre reason behind which I know Pikachu can now speak English...err uh but Kenshin can't speak English? (I give evil glare reminding Shorty that she is unable to contradict my authority on the story) Uh any how on with story.  
  
Kenshin: Uh I don't have time to hide you. That I do not. Good day yellow rat.  
  
Pikachu: I'll have you know that I'm not a yellow rat I'm a Pikachu!  
  
(Kenshin already walked off)  
  
Kenshin: This is a very bizarre day that it is. I hope I don't run into anyone else.  
  
Shorty: And of course since Kenshin has no control of what happens so...  
  
Kenshin: Oh no a huge crowd I need to get through. This is evil! Oh well.  
  
Shorty: So Kenshin starts weaving through a huge crowd of random people.  
  
Kenshin: (at the end of the huge crowd) finally I got through. Huh and I'm already here.  
  
Girl: Welcome Sir Ken.  
  
Kenshin: Hey. How are you/  
  
Girl: Fine. Now hurry it's about to begin.  
  
Kenshin: Oh goodie.  
  
Shorty: Uh WRONG LINE KENSHIN!  
  
Kenshin: Oh then I better hurry, that I should.  
  
(Kenshin walks inside to find a room full of...)  
  
Kenshin: Hello ladies!  
  
Every single girl in the room: Oh Kenshin's here!  
  
Kenshin :( just smiles)  
  
Shorty: That is all for now tune in next time to see... (Another evil glare from me to tell her not to ruin the so far plot less story)... Uh the... Uh next chapter... or something like that. 


	2. She Knows!

Disclaimer: Once again I do not own Rurouni Kenshin or any other what not that I may mention.  
  
Chapter Two: She Knows!  
  
Kenshin: You really like doing bizarre titles don't you?  
  
Me: How is that title bizarre in any way?  
  
Sanoske: Can we get on with the story.  
  
Me: Of course we can once Shorty gets here.  
  
Shorty: I am here I've been here the entire time!  
  
Me: Oh well you're just so short no one must have noticed you. Now on with the story!  
  
Once again the real chapter two: She Knows!  
  
Kaoru: I wonder were Kenshin is he's later that normal.  
  
Megumi: Heh Miss Kaoru.  
  
Kaoru: Oh hello Miss Megumi, how are you?  
  
Megumi: Not very good. I have some bad news Miss Kaoru.  
  
Kaoru: Oh no what's wrong Miss Megumi? Is it Kenshin?  
  
Megumi: Umm, yes. You see. I caught Kenshin with another woman...  
  
Kaoru: WHAT! ARE YOU SERIOUS! WHERE IS HE! I'M GONNA KILL HIM!  
  
Megumi: Now, now Miss Kaoru, don't get yourself so worked up.  
  
Kaoru: Hold on why are you so calm? Are you ling to me?  
  
Megumi: (sweat drop) No I'm not ling I just don't as worked up as you.  
  
Sanoske: Don't worry Miss Kaoru I'm sure if Kenshin didn't like you he'd tell you. Or he wouldn't still be living in your dojo.  
  
Miss Kaoru: Are you saying that Kenshin doesn't like me?  
  
Sanoske: (sweat drop) Woh girl calm down. I never said he didn't like you.  
  
Miss Kaoru: Oh you're both horrible!  
  
Shorty: Ah my first narration of the chapter... Oh uh... With that Miss Kaoru stomped off into town. She hadn't gone far when...  
  
(BUMP)  
  
Kaoru: Ouch! Hey watch were you're going mis...  
  
Shorty: Miss Kaoru looked up to see a man with red hair just like Kenshin's, only it wasn't Kenshin, because the hair was down and kinda looked pink for some reason.  
  
Mystery man: Oh I'm sorry miss I wasn't watching were I was going. Here let me help you up.  
  
Kaoru: Uh thank you. My name is Kaoru, MISS Kaoru.  
  
Mystery man: Nice to meet you Miss Kaoru. I'm Kurama. Are you here all alone?  
  
Kaoru: Sadly yes it seems that my friends have abandoned me.  
  
Kurama: That's horrible. Although I have some what the same st...  
  
Pikachu: Pika, pi, chu, ka?  
  
Kaoru: Ok that is creepy.  
  
Kurama: Very creepy.  
  
Shorty: Meanwhile on the other side of the street.  
  
Kenshin: Bye ladies it's been fun.  
  
Lady one: Oh come on Kenny, don't go.  
  
Lady two: Yah why do you have to go back to that old run down dojo?  
  
Kenshin: Now, now ladies Miss Kaoru is a very nice girl.  
  
Lady one: Yah little pain in the butt of a girl.  
  
Kenshin: Don't any of you worry she's not my type.  
  
Shorty: Just then Pikachu grabbed Kenshin's pant's leg turning him to see Miss Kaoru flirting, with another man, gasp, not just any other man but a, gasp, a man with RED HAIR! Or Pink but it didn't matter.  
  
Kenshin: (to himself) Oh no she has found another man to flirt with what will I ever do!  
  
Me: Umm Kenshin that wasn't your line.  
  
Kenshin: So? What are you going to do about it!  
  
Me: Oh Hiei!  
  
Hiei: What do you want?  
  
Me: Kenshin is being a brat could you take over for a while?  
  
Hiei: Do I get paid more?  
  
Me: Uh no.  
  
Hiei: Fine.  
  
(Hiei comes back and for a very scary reason looks exactly like Kenshin)  
  
Hiei: Isn't that nice Kaoru has found another guy to bother. (Turns to face the ladies) Ok you win I'll stay.  
  
Shorty: *i like hiei, he's nice and strong and* (looks at audience) Oh *cough* Just as Hiei- err Kenshin was about to walk through the door Miss Kaoru caught him.  
  
Kaoru: KENSHIN!(runs over and slaps Kenshin) WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN I'VE BEEN WORRIED SICK?!  
  
Hiei: (looks behind Kaoru at the other man) Looks like you've been just fine. I see you found yourself a younger man right there.  
  
Kaoru: Leave Kurama out of this!  
  
Kurama: (approaching the two) I'll have you know that I am not as young as I look!  
  
Hiei: Right.  
  
Kurama: I really doubt you are older then 500.  
  
Kaoru: (Looks at Kurama) 500 YOU'RE 500!  
  
Kurama: Well give or take a few decades.  
  
Kaoru: (faints)  
  
Hiei: Sorry ladies but it looks like I better take sleeping beauty here home.  
  
All of the Ladies in the place: Oh no Kenshin! Please don't do.  
  
Hiei: Sorry but I must.  
  
Kurama: Hey ladies I'll come.  
  
All of the ladies: Ok, bye Kenshin.  
  
Hiei: That's not fair!  
  
Kurama: Hey that was my intent the entire time.  
  
Hiei: I hate you.  
  
Kurama: I know. Old guys can have a lot of fun too.  
  
Lady three: Come on Kurama.  
  
Hiei: (to him self) wait until he finds out what they really want then he'll be running out of there real fast. That'll be rich! Muahahahahaha!  
  
Shorty: So Hiei. err Kenshin took Miss Kaoru back to the dojo.  
  
Megumi: Oh no Kenshin what happened to Miss Kaoru?  
  
Hiei: Let's just say she found out way too much.  
  
Shorty: Stay tune for the next chapter that will appear. uh. when will it appear? Me: When ever I think it up.  
  
Shorty: Uh ok. So there you have it folks. That is all for now, until when ever. 


	3. Nightmare

Ok this is for that jerk who sent me a non-helpful review. To start out I live on the other side of the country. And another thing don't review unless you have constructive criticism or you like it and want to see more. I don't need to know my work just stinks I need to know how to improve it. I can't make everyone happy so unless you want to get bitched out on the Internet for everyone to see I suggest you reviews with the intent to help. If you don't like how I write then DON'T READ IT!  
  
All right now that, mister jerk is trembling in the corner I feel much better. So now I'll continue my story.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't know if I even have to do this each time but just so I don't loose all of my collage funds on being sued, so naturally I don't own anything that has to do with things that aren't mine. Whatever.  
  
Chapter Three: Nightmare!  
  
Kurama: Uh this doesn't have to do with those women does it?  
  
Me: (I just smile and laugh manically in my head)  
  
Kurama: There is no way I'm going to be embarrassed. I demand a double for this chapter!  
  
Me: Who are we going to find stupid enough to be your double! Wait I know I'll go 8-bit!  
  
Entire cast: (sweat drops)  
  
Me: Oh Fighter?  
  
Fighter: (Poof) Uh where am I?  
  
Me: You are in. uh. dream. no wait a nightmare!  
  
Fighter: Nooooooo!  
  
Me: Yes and now you will be tortured by women! Uh I have a headache now Shorty take it from here.  
  
Chapter Three once again: Nightmare!  
  
Shorty: As Kenshin took Kaoru home Kurama went inside to find out that he was in a.  
  
Fighter: Oh no a retirement home! If only I could of read that sign outside! (turns to one of the ladies) I thought that this was a.  
  
Lady one: Are you nuts we wanted Kenshin to come back in so that we could stay on our brakes.  
  
Fighter: Then no dancing, no singing, what kind of place is this!  
  
Lady two: Oh but Kurama there is dancing, just not the same kind.  
  
Fighter: Noooooo! What horror!  
  
Shorty: Just then Black Mage came blasting in because for reasons beyond even the author's consent Black Mage missed Fighter.  
  
Black Mage: Oh no! A retirement home! (To the three workers) How dare you trick my friend into entering such a (then looking around) disturbing place!  
  
The real Kenshin: Hold it aren't we getting a little too random?  
  
Me: Uh I don't know. Are we?  
  
Kurama: Hey as long as I'm not in it I have no say.  
  
Shorty: Uh naw I think it's just fine.  
  
Me: Ok now on with the story!  
  
Shorty: Back at the dojo. Kenshin (note the real Kenshin) put Ms. Kaoru in bed. And for the sick minded no he was not in the bed with her. WHAT KIND OF SICK DEMENTED PERSON DO YOU TAKE ME FOR?  
  
Yahiko: What happened to her?  
  
Kenshin: Uh she passed out.  
  
Yahiko: Duh. I meant why did she pass out!  
  
Kenshin: Uh bad tofu?  
  
Yahiko: Whatever.  
  
Sanoske: Kenshin who is the flat dude?  
  
Kenshin: what flat dude?  
  
Sanoske: The one next to you.  
  
Kenshin: All I see is a line.  
  
Sara: How dare you call me a line! *SMACK*  
  
Kenshin: *swirly eyes*  
  
Sara: It's called two dimensions!  
  
Kenshin: Oh ok that works. So why are you here?  
  
Sara: The same reason Fighter and Black Mage are still at the retirement home. Duh!  
  
Yahiko: Whatever!  
  
Kaoru: Oh my head. what happened?  
  
Kenshin: Nothing, nothing at all.  
  
Kaoru: WHAT DO YOU MEAN NOTHING!  
  
Kenshin: *cowers in fear* No more hitting the head.  
  
Kaoru: Fine I won't hit you, but you have to tell me what you were doing in that place NOW!  
  
Kenshin: What do you take me for?  
  
Kaoru: *under her breath* An idiot..  
  
Kenshin: For your information I. lost a bet.  
  
Kaoru: ?  
  
Kenshin: well I. uh. had to watch a bunch of old people while the workers took enormously long brakes. like all day brakes.  
  
Kaoru: that's it. that's all it was? I don't believe this! Kenshin you are pathetic. Plus I thought you didn't gamble?  
  
Kenshin: I normally don't but it was on me against a 12 year old so I thought I would win.  
  
Kaoru: Do you expect me to believe that?  
  
Kenshin: yes.  
  
Kaoru: Whatever.  
  
Shorty: And that ends this chapter. Join us next time to see the wondrous works of. this story. ok I'm done. Oh Hiei?  
  
Hiei: What?  
  
Shorty: Come here.  
  
Hiei: OMG NOOOOO! Not that anything but that!  
  
(Hiei runs away screaming in terror)  
  
Me: And you will never know what she wanted ether. Muahahahahaha.cough*. Muahaha. oh forget it you guys don't care any who.  
  
SEE YOU AROUND..  
  
Note: If you have any ideas, complaints, or complements please e-mail me @ amineaddict@comcast.net and please have it be constructive criticism.  
  
Thank you. 


	4. Getting too random subtitled: Even for t...

Disclaimer: Once again I don't own anything I may bring up in this. So do not fear dear lawyers I will not force you to earn thousands of dollars be suing my butt off until not even my creations are left.  
  
Me: Ok I'm tired of typing just me for well uh me so from now on I will be known as the ESTEEMED CREATOR OF THIS FANFICTION and I expect to be called that too by all of my lonely minions or servants. But to make life easier for my readers as well as my narrator, it can just be ECTF I hope that doesn't stand for anything in some language some where out in cyber space.  
  
Shorty: Uh ok ECTF you're going way off base here this story is about Rurouni Kenshin.  
  
THE ESTEEMED CREATOR OF THIS FANFICTION: Whoa that is a long title ok the writer (me) can also use the short hand. Any how, so you think this is just about Rurouni Kenshin? I think not! On with the chapter:  
  
Chapter four: Getting too random (subtitled: Even for the ESTEEMED.ACTORS!)  
  
Kenshin: Ok is it just me or were we just in the dojo?  
  
Kaoru: Um where are we?  
  
Fighter: I have no idea.  
  
Insane voice: But what FuN is it if a few precious lives aren't lost?  
  
Kenshin: I'm confused.  
  
Yuske: For the first time its not just Kuabarra.  
  
Kuabarra: Shut-Up Yuske!!!  
  
Hiei: At least I don't have to be Kenshin anymore. (in a low voice). and with me dressed up in my alter ego of Blue Gender's Han Shorty will never find me. I hope.(turns to the audience) NOTHING HAPPENED BETWEEN US SO STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!  
  
Kurama: Hi-  
  
Hiei: *cough  
  
Kurama: Sorry Uh Han I don't think you have to worry.  
  
Hiei: I don't care.  
  
Yuske: Will you stop flirting.  
  
ECTF: HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST SUCH A THING! YUSKE AM I GOING TO HAVE TO KICK YOU OUT OF THIS FANFICTION?  
  
Yuske: no  
  
ECTF: Ok.  
  
Kenshin: So who's the clown bent on destruction?  
  
Clown bent on destruction: I am not a CLOWN I am an eeeevil mastermind, Kefka!  
  
Locke: Who- (looks at Yukina) hey your kinda quite.  
  
Hiei: Back off!  
  
Celes: Locke!  
  
Locke: Oh Celes. you're still here. you see I was. uh. Treasure Hunting!  
  
Kefka: Uh hello here I'm take over the world now.  
  
Kenshin: No you're not. I wont allow you to harm any more-  
  
Some guy with a red trench coat: Women!  
  
Kenshin: uh that's not what I was going to say but ok that works. By the way who are you?  
  
Guy:.  
  
ECTF: He's Vash the Stampede  
  
Vash: Uh yea sure. Now you evil hearted criminal you should only believe in-  
  
ECTF: NO VASH non of that, you will drive away the readers.  
  
POOF Vash disappears.  
  
Kenshin: ok that was.  
  
POOF  
  
A kid: ooo so that is what that button does.  
  
Kenshin: who are you.  
  
Kid: Ed's name is Ed, short for-  
  
ECTF: NO ED NOW GO HOME NOW!  
  
Once again POOF bye, bye Ed.  
  
Kenshin: Ok once again that was.  
  
PO-  
  
Kenshin: NO MORE INTERRUPTIONS DURING ONE OF MY LINES!  
  
oooff  
  
Kenshin: Thank you. Now evil being you will die.  
  
*cough  
  
Kenshin: Oh yea I can't kill ok then I will hire. (looks around) Locke to kill you!  
  
Locke: Dude read the memo I'm a Treasure Hunter not an assassin.  
  
MEMO:  
  
I Locke Cole am a Treasure Hunter. NOT A THIEF. Thank you  
  
Kenshin: Okay well what about for a girl friend.  
  
Locke: ok  
  
Kefka: Nooooooo *dies with no violence what so ever just from the thought of Locke killing him.  
  
Locke: so what chick do I get?  
  
Kenshin: (looks around) you can have uh the author!  
  
ECTF: I THINK NOT I 'M TAKEN!  
  
Kenshin: ok then you can have Miss Kaoru.  
  
Locke: COOL!  
  
Kaoru: KENSHIN!  
  
Kenshin: What?  
  
Kaoru: (Pulls out a huge hammer and.)  
  
SMACK!  
  
Kenshin: *swirl eyes  
  
Celes: Plus Locke you promised me.  
  
Locke: So. I promise that to every chick I met.  
  
Celes: Miss Kaoru may I borrow that hammer?  
  
Kaoru: Of course.  
  
SMACK!  
  
Locke: *tear (along with an over sized bump on his head)  
  
Vash: So if ladies want to go out later?  
  
Kaoru/Celes: NO!  
  
SMACK!  
  
Vash: *tear (also with the over sized bump)  
  
Yukina: That wasn't very nice.  
  
Kaoru: Perhaps not but it's the only way to keep some boys under control.  
  
Celes: And less annoying.  
  
Kayko: Hum. I should use that tactic on Yuske, it would probably work a lot better than just yelling at him.  
  
All the men run away screaming (exempting Hie- err Han he's too proud to do such an act like some one else we all know, Vegeta perhaps).  
  
ECTF: So that finishes everything up for another chapter of randomness . What crazy things might our gang encounter next time? It maybe YOU! Maybe. or it could be some random person like. well you'll just have to wait because of this point not even I know.maybe.  
  
Shorty: Why wasn't I in this chapter?  
  
ECTF: You were.  
  
Shorty: When?  
  
ECTF: At the begging and now at the intermission. kidding the end.  
  
Shorty: THAT'S NOT FAIR!  
  
ECTF: Well of course not. But that's life so live with it. 


End file.
